Happiness is not something that always comes easily to me, which is probably why 2 Nephi 5:27 has always fascinated me.
“And it came to pass that we lived after the manner of happiness.”
What does that even mean? I’ve experienced enough hard things in my life that I’m always a little cynical of the whole “follow this formula and you’ll get this result” way of thinking that sometimes gets preached in Sunday School. What if I follow the formula and didn’t get the desired result? Does that mean that I did something wrong? Or that my way of following the formula was not as good as my Sunday School friend did? Or maybe that I don’t actually deserve the blessings in the first place?
Or maybe I’m asking all the wrong questions.
Most of us can easily recite the words to, “I Am a Child of God”, yet do we really believe the words? President Packer said, that “No idea has been more destructive of happiness, no philosophy has produced more sorrow, more heartbreak and mischief; no idea has done more to destroy the family than the idea that we are not the offspring of God”
Sometimes I think we get so caught up in the complexities of life that we do forget that we are literally children of God. He knows me. He loves me. And he absolutely wants me to be happy. That doesn’t mean that I’ll be happy in every moment, but that in the trenches of life when I’m bogged down and not feeling happy, that is when it is most important to remember our divine heritage and to look forward to happiness to come.
I love this quote from Elder Uchtdorf: “My dear brothers and sisters, it may be true that man is nothing in comparison to the greatness of the universe. At times we may even feel insignificant, invisible, alone, or forgotten. But always remember—you matter to Him! God sees you not only as a mortal being on a small planet who lives for a brief season—He sees you as His child. He sees you as the being you are capable and designed to become. He wants you to know that you matter to Him.”
Let me repeat that...you matter to Him! He cares about you and your journey.
In 2 Nephi 26:33 it reads, “...he inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him…”
President Hinckley said of this scripture, “I believe {that scripture} is saying to each of us, be happy. The gospel is a thing of joy. It provides us with a reason for gladness. Of course there are times of sorrow. Of course there are hours of concern and anxiety. We all worry. But the Lord has told us to lift our hearts and rejoice”
I read that quote and thought back to the time several years ago when our 16-year-old son was living full-time in the hospital for many months. He had an aggressive form of cancer with less than a 50% chance of surviving. Additionally, less than a week after his diagnosis, Glen very unexpectedly lost his job. We were completely blindsided by two enormous life-changing stressors at once and it was hard not to feel overwhelmed with the enormity of what we were facing.
But guess what?
We may not have been all that happy during that time, but we were okay. I never in a million years would want to repeat that experience, but I believe that by “living after the manner of happiness” that we were blessed with an underlying sense of calmness that overcame the feelings of overwhelm. We absolutely went through a lot of really crappy things and didn’t know what amount of even more crappy things might be coming our way, but we somehow just knew in our hearts that we’d be okay. We had no sense of what okay would look like, but whatever the result of Spencer’s treatment and Glen’s job search, that in the end we’d be okay.
And we were.
We struggled mightily along the way (and our struggles are far from over), but even amidst the struggles we had that underlying sense of calm, glimpses of the divine, and a knowledge that God was in the details of it.
So what does “living after the manner of happiness” mean to me?
It means doing my best to live in a way that God can communicate with me, so that I can allow myself to feel his comfort and love, in good and bad times. It means putting one foot in front of the other and seeking for ways to fill my life with beauty, meaning, and love. It means putting aside the distractions for a time each day and looking for ways I can partake of his goodness. It means being vulnerable and allowing people to help me when I’m struggling. It means seeking for ways to build and support those around me who may be struggling more than they appear. It means remembering when I'm not happy, that happiness will return...eventually. It means being mindful and recognizing God’s hand in my life. And it means remembering who I am and trusting that God wants me to be happy.
What does "living after the manner of happiness" mean to you? I'd love to hear what's on your mind.
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SOURCES:
https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2011/10/you-matter-to-him?lang=enghttp://www.byui.edu/devotionals/elder-jeffrey-r-holland
https://speeches.byu.edu/talks/marlin-k-jensen/living-manner-of-happiness/
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