1. Getting kids involved in activities at too young of an age--the day will come soon enough when their lives will be filled with comings and goings, why make their life (and your life) prematurely crazy? Too much competition and running to and fro is not going to help their development or arguably their athleticism (remember I'm talking about kids 8 and under). I personally believe that one of the contributing factors to the childhood obesity epidemic is making kids believe that the only way to be active is at a sports practice or game. For as great as sports are for teaching teamwork and learning about healthy competition (when they're old enough), it's not real life. Running, jumping, and good old-fashioned playing with other children will teach them just as much about teamwork as any sport and help them to develop a fitter and healthier lifestyle.
Lest anyone accuse me of being anti-sports or anything, I have to say that Glen and I were both high school athletes (and Glen a collegiate athlete) and we both feel very strongly that sports are a great thing for our kids....just not too much too soon. While you may not agree with my ideology, it has single-handedly been the biggest stress reducer in our lives (and saved the earth {and my behind} from all those extra car trips too).
2. Daily baths. Okay, don't call me an unfit mother here. I just don't see any reason why my kids need daily baths, unless they're actually dirty. If my kids don't smell good or are filthy, they'll get an extra bath, but otherwise twice a week works great when they're young. As soon as they're old enough to care enough to bathe themselves (in the shower), they can bathe whenever they want. This idea has streamlined our bedtime routine significantly and saved us from using 35-50 gallons of water per day.
3. Cooking three course meals. With as much as I like to cook, this one may surprise you, but I really believe that a healthy main dish, with a raw fruit or vegetable to be a perfectly fine meal. I serve a salad kit, or a handful of baby carrots with ranch dressing, or have apple or orange slices, or a simple fruit and spinach smoothie (which they love by the way). I feel like the raw fruits and veggies are better for them anyway and it lets me focus in on making the main dish, rather than spreading myself even thinner at that crazy time of day. It means I'm less stressed, we eat earlier (so the kids are happier), and I don't use any more energy (mine or the earth's) in giving my kids a side dish. My exception to this is that I often make homemade bread when we have soup for dinner.
4. Getting kids into too many activities (at any age). Going along with my #1, I think if an older child is excited about music or sports or art, by all means find an outlet for them to develop their talents (and interests), but why on earth do so many people think that their kids need to do it all? With heavy homework loads that seem to be creeping ever earlier into their school years, I feel like it's so important that kids have time to be kids. Like #1, it benefits the earth reducing the daily car trips we take.
5. Saying, No, too quickly. When I'm tired and busy, it is often my knee-jerk reaction to bark out, "No," to every question they ask of me. I'm trying really hard to be better at pausing before I answer one way or the other. While there's certainly plenty of opportunities to say no, but I feel like, in general, kids should hear more yeses than nos. I remember a quote from Marjorie Hinckley who said that for every no she said to her children, she followed it with a yes...."No, you can't have a doughnut for dinner, but you can have one for breakfast tomorrow morning." I'm definitely still working on this one! This one benefits the earth by reducing the noise pollution coming from my house.
6. Trying to solve the kids problems for them. Whether it be kids fighting, an argument with a friend, or a homework woe, it is my natural instinct to rush to the rescue and try to fix it. While I still have to interject when they start yelling and screaming, I'm trying to be more hands off when it comes to finding their own solutions. It saves my sanity and teaches them better coping mechanisms and it saves the earth by me sending out more confident and capable children into the world who know how to deal with their own troubles.
7. Caring about what they wear. As long as they're clean and modest, who cares? I have a child who 9 nights out of ten wears their jeans to bed. It used to drive me crazy, but then I realized that he was still sleeping fine despite his uncomfortable attire, and the only person who cared one iota was me. Same with the child who completely refused to wear collared shirts. And the other who continues to dress in mismatching layers. And the other who went an entire summer without wearing shorts because he didn't feel like it. And still another who is growing so fast their clothes are almost always too small. I still have to fight my tendency to say anything, but I'm learning it's just one of those things that just doesn't matter a tiny bit and it's not worth the stress caring about it. And the earth? I'm stretching here, but letting my kids out of the house in their goofy outfits makes the world a little brighter and brings smiles to people's faces. Plus if you have a child like mine who refuses to wear pajamas, it's just one less thing in the laundry pile. :)
8. I know it's cliche, but sweating the small things--Things that involve their safety or eternal salvation are too important to mess up on, but life is too short to spend fretting over all the things that don't matter or that we don't have any control over anyway.
What would you add to this list?
This topic is taken from #11 on the list, 30 Things to Blog About , so if you have any more requests feel free to go back to that post and write in your vote for a topic for me to cover.
Coming next: What parts of motherhood are worth sticking with, despite the time they take.
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